I am a Mama's girl. For much of my childhood, my relationship with my mother was strained. As she battled her own personal trauma and struggles, I developed residual trauma and struggles as a result. As a young girl, I remember thinking that I could "fix her". I wanted to wipe away her pain, rescue her from her lows, and show her who she was in the image that I saw her in... beautiful, healthy, whole. Unfortunately, as I later learned, I could not heal nor fix my Mama. I don’t have that power. Even more, that’s not my role or my responsibility. My role and responsibility is to only love and forgive, beyond conditions.
Over the years, and by the Grace of God, my relationship with my mother has been restored. Although she still has her struggles (as we all do), I am always reminded of her triumphs. The lows that she has bounced back from, and her continuous “decision" to push forward day after day despite her circumstances. I honor her, not only for who she is- but because I know that she could easily decide to give-up, give-out or give-in. She is her own worse critic (in a major way), so she would argue me down that she is not doing anything worth being proud of. But oh boy...I beg to differ. Each day that she decides to get up and face the day is a triumph in my eyes. And I am grateful for every triumph. No matter how small.
I have learned many things from my Mama. But even more importantly, I have learned many life lessons through my mother’s journey.
1. You are not who they say you are.
2. You are not what happened to you.
3. Even if NO ONE else ever believes you, hold fast to your truth.
4. You are not to blame.
5. You were born with a purpose, and it is never too late to start fulfilling it.
6. Recovery is lifelong.
7. Each day begins anew.
8. God forgives.
9. God heals.
10. God restores.
Lord, I thank you!